Abandoned Castle

Abandoned Castle by Valerie Parente

She thought she had it all figured out
when she was young
dreaming of a big grand castle
glowing under the sun.
She thought she would live in a fairytale
when she grew up
dancing in a glorious castle
a place to fall in love.

The years piled on
the castle’s appeal faded.
Some say she grew up
some say she grew jaded.
Love is not as simple
as the moss that covers stone.
Dreams are not meaningful
until you fail, then you grow.
Now ivy on the walls
climbs up so very tall
and with dreams so big
she began to feel small.
That’s when the abandonment happened
and she realized fantasies can cause harm
often inflated by a toxic desire
so she decided to move on.

Tale be told, she abandoned her castle
but that is no more than folklore;
she didn’t abandon that castle
that castle abandoned her
and that turned out to be
the castle’s greatest favor
for when the fantasizing ceased
she began to enjoy the real world.

– Valerie Parente (3-7-2021)

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For the Love of Fantasy

For The Love of Fantasy by Valerie Parente

Nothing has ever made me feel more alive,
than turning a stream of consciousness into fantasy rhymes,
bringing to life dark fairytales that pull at heartstrings,
taking a subtle mood and honing the art of exaggerating.
The beautiful quality of fantasy and daydreamed worlds
is that nothing is literal, it’s all a hypothetical metaphor,
and just because I am the narrator of something literary
does not mean I’ve mistaken my story with reality.
I’m inspired by what’s in my psyche, not the world outside
creating scripts for daydreamers who don’t feel whole in real life.

– Valerie Parente (8-13-2020)

The Silver Screen

Bloom

The Silver Screen by Valerie Parente

My daydreams bloom from whatever prominent emotion I am feeling.

My daydreams seem to subconsciously and intuitively unravel themselves into ideal scenarios.
Like a movie the daydreams play out in a succession of mental frames on a cortical film reel. At best the mental fabrication distributes its duty between the two-track mind and I maintain my presence; above the absolute threshold I am in the audience and below the absolute threshold I am in the director’s chair. The dialogues between imaginary friends on the silver screen happen so instantaneously that the script’s origin teeters on the line between voluntary and involuntary awareness.

My daydreams are finalized by obsessive and repetitive hindsight.
When mentally reviewed these fantastic mental purges reveal subliminal truths. The loose reigns of control over the internal screenplays, regularly referred to as “imagination”, masquerade as intrusive images too appropriate and too satisfying to be resented.

– Valerie Parente (2-18-17)

The Daydreamer’s Inner Playwright

The tough part of being mindfully present when you are an introverted daydreamer is separating yourself as the existential human you are in reality aside from the inner playwright tinkering away within your brain. Daydreamers always have that anticipatory screenwriter designating mental energy, time, and focus onto future “could be” situations. The screenwriter’s role is to fantasize, modify, and mentally record dynamic imaginary scenarios onto the false memory film reel of the brain. They hone a future-oriented duty to wonder how events might transpire in the best possible way- “best” determined by an idealism based on multi-dimensional enlightenment from both profound and simple life lessons, not the same “best” seen as consecutive achievements of one-dimensional pleasurable experiences. Like any good book, the anticipatory daydreamer cares about writing your lifestory so that it conveys important messages and strikes as interesting.
But here’s where the dilemma arises. You are not an omniscient author of your lifestory. You cannot control or inherently understand the underlying workings of the external world, other people, and forces. You can only control and understand you.
To be grounded with your head in the clouds poses an impossible Schrödinger’s cat kind of dual state. A grounded, mindful person makes the most out of their experiences by coexisting with nature, observing and recognizing the sensations in the present. Meanwhile, a person with their head in the clouds is figuring out how to control and create nature- too busy being a superhuman scribe to be an affected character in the cosmic blueprint. Daydreamers are omniscient playwrights heedlessly attempting to define real people and real settings into character roles and plot lines. They are compelled to think up ways in which events will unfold, how Person A will come to meet Person B, and what the underlying motives for all parties involved might be… these are tasks no human being can do with their reality outside of penning a fictitious narrative on the sidelines.

With This Pen, I Thee Write
There is an anticipation in the daydreamer that can inappropriately bleed into the unfolding plain of the material world. This is not to say that anticipating life’s experiences is unhealthy- anticipation serves a very healthy purpose when used appropriately. You should anticipate your actions, reactions, and emotions, not those belonging to other people. There is a difference between anticipating how you will deal with given situations versus anticipating how the world will deal out situations. It is not your job to think up who you are going to meet at a certain setting or how people are going to feel about your choices. Leave the ‘how’ component to whatever omniscient forces dictate the universe. Focus on your current goal, focus on being the best you can be in this very moment, and do not focus on how every future person, place, or thing could play out in relevance to your goal until that person, place, or thing has stumbled its way into the reality of your present state. Daydreaming can be an exhilarating activity that can turn into worthwhile projects about alternate characters leading alternate lives, but daydreaming is not how you make the most of the life you are currently leading.

-Valerie Parente (10-29-16)

Daydreams Are Shadows

Daydream CastleDaydreams are shadows. They linger. They follow. To exist, a glimmer of hope has to shine down in order to cast a sincere outline whose unique shape derives from that which occupies space in reality. They are projections captured between all we are made up of and a guiding light above. No matter how much we may want to reach out and physically touch them, they will always remain intangible entities that can only be felt with the imagination we each have.

– Valerie Parente (6-18-16)

The Masterpiece Tragedy of Marionette

Marionette shines in the spotlight.

“You are a superstar, young lady!”

“I am no more than a puppet attached to the make-believe! These ideal scenarios! These insurmountable expectations! These flashing images of perfection! My imagination pulls the strings!”

“But you are at the center of the stage!”

“I am tied back by the theatre of an overactive imagination!”

With a razor in hand Marionette breaks free and collapses, for she never properly learned how to keep her feet on the ground.

The Masterpiece Tragedy of Marionette

– Valerie Parente (6-7-16)