There’s Clearly Something Wrong With Me But I Kind of Don’t Care Anymore

There’s Clearly Something Wrong With Me But I Kind of Don’t Care Anymore
by Valerie Parente

I once had a date try to kiss me
I shoved him off of me ever so quickly.
I once had a man grab me by the waist
I ran off before I could see the embarrassment on his face.
I once had a guy hold my hand on a walk
all I could think was “I can’t wait to wash him off”.
I once had a movie night with a boy that drove me crazy
I was pissed when he interrupted every scene trying to touch me.
I once had a guy ask me for a kiss
I was so damn uncomfortable I purposely missed.
I once had a boy text me over and over about his day
I didn’t add him in my contacts in the hopes he’d go away.
Not once, not twice, not even three times
did I go out of my way to make a fool of these guys
because when someone sees romantic potential in me
you can bet I’ll try to sabatoge it immediately.

– Valerie Parente (9-21-2020)

Sick Cycle

Sick Cycle by Valerie Parente

The fear of intimacy comes from the fear of touch
and the fear of touch comes from the fear of germs
and the fear of germs comes from the fear of intimacy
and I’m stuck in a sick cycle of social chastity.

– Valerie Parente (9-20-2020)