Dissonant Demons by Valerie Parente
My eyes want to cry
but I’m not sad in my mind.
My body wants to be burned
but my heart is already warm.
I’m trying to think of ways
to hurt myself without causing pain.
These demons, they try to stay relevant,
but my glorious God is not hellbent.
– Valerie Parente (3-4-2019)
The entire universe and its blessings are in the palm of my hand by Valerie Parente
The entire universe and its blessings are in the palm of my hand. I can feel the energy that makes up you and me and everything in between and I am in awe that I did not notice until now how interconnected we all are with the energy we spawned from. I still have longings but I feel so whole and complete like my longings long back for me. I feel that my blessings walk beside me even when they can’t be seen. I am not discouraged when things do not go my way, I am empowered. Every struggle is proof that I am worthy of more than I hoped to settle for and I am in awe and in love with the story the universe writes about me.
– Valerie Parente (9-27-2018)
One Dimension by Valerie Parente
Somebody died today.
It felt like it was me
But it looked like it was you.
When I told you how I felt every word just bounced off you.
What meant years to me meant nothing to you
And how sad it is to be forgotten too.
They say smile because it happened
But how can I smile when you have no memory of me.
You’re a one dimension mind who can’t look back at our time
And I had you right in front of me
But there was a disconnect in your eyes.
The boy I knew had died
Without ever saying goodbye
And in one second the weight of three and a half years came down
And buried me ten feet in the ground.
You lost me and you lost what gave you meaning
But somehow I’m the one who’s grieving.
I hope you find your peace
And for the first time I realize you won’t find it in me.
– Valerie Parente (9-4-2018)
Looking At The World Upside Down by Valerie Parente
At first I thought my reality had flipped
accredited to an objective view
but this melancholy feels too personal
It must be the sickness in my mood.
I have been feeling so low these days
Barely hanging onto my sanity
I know I am moving backwards
But I cannot feel the ground beneath me.
I have difficulty finding my direction
Hesitant to trust my inner compass
And truthfully, I see no point in trying
Since the day my heart aimed and missed.
The world is no different than before
It is my perspective that has changed
I made a choice to distort my vision
When my priorities rearranged.
Looking at the world upside down
I can only see in morbid shades of red
But I guess that is supposed to happen
When the blood rushes to your head.
– Valerie Parente (4-23-2018)
Potential In Action by Valerie Parente
To identify this catalyst felt right
I know that something special will happen
There is this lingering hope so well-timed
Like a tangible potential in action.
Magic hones the human existence
This sense diagnosed as divine intuition
We all can access its many promises
If we make the decision to listen.
Do not let your chance sweep by
When you are met by the extrasensory
That realm of “what could be” for mankind
stems from your instinct to detect destiny.
– Valerie Parente (3-19-2018)
“Devil’s Advocate” by Valerie Parente
Cynic by Valerie Parente
He has a very quick wit and he uses it to guard himself
Always the cynic, never fails to cast a doubt
Playing devil’s advocate to get a rise from the crowd
But I think there’s a twist he doesn’t want figured out
I’ve begun to notice that the words in his mouth
Are fueled by conflict but claim an impartial sound
He declares disinterest, yet he still sticks around
While using logic to debate rational grounds
This seems to contradict the face of a neutral account
Because no true nihilist has a belief worth caring about
I know when he reads this he’ll just shut me down
He’ll laugh and dismiss the complexity I’ve announced
With the same rhetoric that makes him so profound.
– Valerie Parente (3-5-2018)
Incognito by Valerie Parente
You were so upset, but you wouldn’t admit why
All my words you’d deflect, like there was something to hide
And although you seemed tense, I didn’t want to pry
I wonder why you protect your highly cynical side
Well I guess that depends where your priorities lie
Maybe I can’t cure your distress, but I wish you’d give me a try
Because behind your comments a second message resides
Even though you pretend there’s no need to analyze
Call me crazy and obsessed, but I think it’s a sign
That the voice in your head still found a place in my mind.
– Valerie Parente (2-15-2018)
Young Sapling by Valerie Parente
You, Young Sapling, dig your roots deeper into the ground,
becoming more rigid and stubborn with every anxiety beneath your surface.
The conflict is that you did not want to grow up,
but time forced you to, as it does to all nature around to you.
But the difference between you and the others was that they embraced their growing pains
and instead you strengthened the roots that were already there.
Mother Nature wanted things from you that you were not ready to give
and rather than wait to be ready, you dug deeper into the dirt and resisted force.
You told yourself the extremist belief that you would never be ready.
You told yourself that this refusal to budge was part of your persiting identity.
And now more time has gone by and you still have to grow up, but you are lost.
So you hyper-focus your motivation on making proud the seed that first planted you.
You shut out the forest because to acknowledge the others
feels like abandoning those precious roots, and your pride will not allow this.
You numbed yourself from the changes in the weather pressure,
making it so hard to see the signs that you are now finally ready to grow up.
And how beautiful is it, Young Sapling, that Mother Nature placed another tree so close to you,
another sapling who dealt with the same trauma of not wanting to grow up,
another sapling that wants to be able to stretch out its branches to reach yours
and grow alongside you.
“We Can Grow Together” by Valerie Parente
– Valerie Parente (11-18-2017)
Mars by Valerie Parente
I hold on to the moments where I am seen
using the past to verify my identity
but identifying with the ego is toxicity
by equating your nature to personality
you lose touch with the potential of who you could be.
– Valerie Parente (11-15-2017)
Egomaniac by Valerie Parente
I’m torn apart by this tragedy.
But in the eyes of a sane person
This has nothing to do with me.
So I feel ashamed and I try to stuff the pain down.
Because the last thing a tragedy needs
Is a selfish person like me.
– Valerie Parente (10-24-17)
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