Tag: Eating Disorder

Encased

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Encased by Valerie Parente

I know I said I killed my younger self
but I was lying
I didn’t kill her
I locked her away
so that she would feel safe.

I thought I threw away the key
so I could preserve her whimsy
but I forgot in my haste
that behind a glass case
she could watch the world change
while staying the same age.

My life went on and progressed
with my inner child as my witness
and it took a long time
before I finally realized
I wasn’t trying to prove myself
to society or anyone else.

I’m not trying to impress you
I’m trying to impress 12 year old me
to be her idea of beauty
so that she could see
all those big scary feelings
didn’t kill her dreams
and it was this epiphany
that revealed the key
so I unlocked the case
and I set younger me free
as a way to say “forgive me
I loved you more than anything
may you go with ease
may you go with peace.”

– Valerie Parente (11-23-2025)

Starving Artist

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Starving Artist by Valerie Parente

Eat your words and be compelled
to doubt the passion within myself
when you say I’m not a successful artist
because I haven’t made a profit
that I’m supposed to make money from my art
but I only spend money making art so far
struggling to make it accessible
striving to make it impressionable
but I guess I’m just a “starving artist”
scrambling for coins in empty pockets
how am I supposed to hide from depression and inaction
when I’m standing in the open begging for traction
and the “starving artist” in me starved before
the teenager with anorexia as her mentor
my talent used to be limiting my intake
now my talent is having something of value to say
so don’t you dare preach to me about starvation
when I already mastered the art of deliberate deprivation
if the world really insists on giving me this title
I’m going to be hellbent and entitled
when you use the label “starving artist” again
I’ll eat your words while rhyming them.

– Valerie Parente (9-28-2025)

The Damsel & The Demon (INTRO)

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The Damsel & The Demon
by Valerie Parente

There once was a Damsel named Daphne
and when she was just a girl
she started having intrusive thoughts
that drew her to the underworld.

There stood the kingdom of Nefaria
ruled by a soul sucking Demon
he preyed on the vulnerable
by giving them something to believe in.

With the incessant rhymes in her head
the Damsel turned to the Demon for relief
tolerating and even aiding
the damned souls he heartlessly reaped.

But in a moment of profound strength
Daphne had a change of heart
she felt the fire in her own soul,
all it took was one spark.

From that day began a journey
where her codependence would be unlearned
finding a power within herself
Daphne would be the Damsel no more.

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The Damsel & The Demon by Valerie Parente

The Damsel & The Demon OUT NOW

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The Damsel & The Demon by Valerie Parente

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The Damsel & The Demon is a poetry/fantasy story hybrid (verse novel) meant to be an allegory for the healing process, whether that be healing from addiction, a toxic relationship, a traumatic event, or anything in between. Valerie drew inspiration from her personal struggle with obsessive compulsive disorder and anorexia to create this Allegory for Healing through the lens of the main character, Daphne. For both Daphne and Valerie, fleeting feelings can only exist as fixations, and the rhythmic stanzas of an internal dialogue, playing like poetry, is the conduit between the mentally disordered author and the hexed protagonist of this story. There is so much beauty in healing, but healing is still ever so messy, uncovering darkness where we expected light and vice versa. Determined to create this massive poem with no help from search engines or AI, Valerie made it her mission to come up with every rhyme on her own; turning to the internet for help was forbidden. As a result, The Damsel & The Demon is an authentic fantastical dark fairytale scripture rich with revelations and an aim to help readers everywhere see themselves in the damsel archetype as well as the ailment they struggle to separate from in the demon.

Valerie Parente is a writer and artist from Massachusetts whose bodies of work often explore the theme, “Finding beauty in darkness” and general mental health awareness.

Trigger

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Trigger by Valerie Parente

How many people
roam around the world
trying not to be triggered
because the everyday man in the everyday trance
doesn’t understand
that the recovery phase
isn’t the same as unfazed.

It creeps up on you
these triggers
in the middle of a good day with a smile on your face
but you’re not okay
and the others don’t have a clue
that there’s a weapon inside of you
in the shape of a thought
waiting to be set off.

Therein lies the trickiness
of mental illness;
it’s invisible to everyone else
so we never know when we trigger it.

But there’s a beauty in you
that should be mentioned;
that you don’t go around the world
being unaffected.

Your triggers make you human
through and through
because what is a flawless mind
but a lesser version of me and you.

– Valerie Parente (6-22-2025)

Forbidden Fruit

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Forbidden Fruit by Valerie Parente

Temptation isn’t temptation
without a moral compass
and sin isn’t sin
without omniscient justice.
But who gets to say
what is and isn’t forbidden?
Who are you really spiting
with the apple you’ve bitten?
How can you say my nature is evil
if I was created in His image
then turn around and say He loves me
without any conditions?

I’ve deprived myself long enough
thanks to willful ignorance,
starved myself
thinking I would be different,
felt the bones of my ribcage
with blind commitment,
realized I lost half my life
to a sick and twisted vision,
then rose from the dead
with a whole new mission;
I will sink my teeth into fruit
regardless of permission.

– Valerie Parente (5-31-2025)

Mirror Mirror

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Mirror Mirror by Valerie Parente

Mirror mirror
on the wall
why do you lie
to girls so small
they turned to you
and asked what’s wrong
then you showed them themselves
and did them harm.
Don’t speak about fair
when innocence is involved
you are no bastion
of truth at all.

– Valerie Parente (5-26-2025)

Mermaid Hair & A Little Black Dress

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Mermaid Hair & A Little Black Dress
by Valerie Parente

Mermaid hair and a little black dress
one for my inner child
one for her last breath.

Because I wasn’t ready
to grow up just yet
so when I felt wronged
I found poetic justice.

They said “what do you want to be when you grow up?”
and I said “a girl with mermaid hair”
for all the times as a kid
that I was too scared
of the fateful hour glass
and its ground of sand
so I stuck my head in the clouds
not all quite there
regressing and digressing
into my own fairy tale.

They said “dress as the impression you want to give”
so I wore a little black dress
’cause black goes with everything
and I’m an artist
breaking down reality
so it all makes sense
to little kid me
and the woman she respects
so that one fateful day
the heart in my chest
will end its marathon
with little to no regrets.

– Valerie Parente (5-11-2025)

Flood

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Flood by Valerie Parente

Numb
numb
numb
then like a flood
I felt it all
grief, guilt, but most of all
the feeling of being loved
and I could never be mad
at the way my loved ones loved me
when I was incapable
of feeling sorry
because they were the ones that cared
when I was too scared
and they cried
cried
cried
like a flood
in dry air.

I feel it all now
for all those times that I caused pain
and I just want my support system to know
the love was never in vain
the storm clouds are gone
but I am here, I remain
and I am more grateful
than a flower is to rain.

– Valerie Parente (5-9-2025)

Heart In My Throat

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Heart In My Throat by Valerie Parente

I had a distressing dream
that my heart was in my throat
and the voice inside of me
didn’t know how to flow.

I struggled to tell the elders
I could not survive like this
but they were just happy
that love in me still exists.

All of my love and heartache
at the same level I consume
the two were not the same
but my signals were askew.

A heart in the throat
is a very strange case
I could still feel it all
it just came from the wrong place.

It is not an easy way to live
and I had trouble vocalizing
how I would not survive
but I kept on surviving.

When I awoke, I remembered my youth
and how I thought I’d die instead of grow
but here I am, my adulthood so full of love
each day fulfilled beyond my wildest hopes.

I think it was young me all along
trying to communicate
“Thank you for believing I was wrong”
to the elder in me today.

– Valerie Parente (1-26-2025)