You And I

July 19, 2019June 22, 2020Leave a comment

You And I by Valerie Parente

I need to stop making your problems mine…
… but they became my problem when you looked me in the eyes
and told me you despise
everything about your mind
but I think your thoughts are divine
so I said you’re one of a kind
and for those hours you cried
which was a beautiful sight
but I had to pretend to be blind
to keep you from turning to ice
then days and days went by
and you became surprised
that we were far more alike
than you were ready to find
so you made me the bad guy
and called it a crime
when I asked if you were fine
because for me to care if you’re alright
would surely be a sign
that we were on the same side
and you’re absolutely terrified
of people associating your name with mine
because then there’s a chance you might
feel emotions you’ve attempted to hide
but the truth is you were just as inclined
to see me in that light
that’s why you went and tried
to accuse me of crossing a line
even though you were the first to define
that there was a certain vibe
when it was just you and I
because one day you’d act nice
then the next day you’d pick a fight
because God forbid you admit you like
hanging out with a girl who can recognize
the anxiety you secretly abide
and I’m done obeying your fright
so I’ll call you out for your spite
whenever these feelings arise
then you’ll freak out and deny
that’s why I began to transcribe
all the psychological insight
that you try to push aside
and I’m sorry if that makes you uptight
but you can only blame your pride
because you’ve gone so long tied
between comfort and doing what’s right
for yourself and the person who understands your type
and I’m done making another compromise
for someone whose busy living a lie
and cares more about getting high
than connecting with someone who just summarized
what you’re too afraid to clarify
and if you hear me out then decide
to continue this self-destructive ride
then I hope that you realize
everything about you that I write
was an attempt to save your life
because I see you’re so dead inside
but I want you to be alive.

Align

– Valerie Parente (6-10-2019)

Divinity

July 18, 2019July 18, 20191 Comment

"You Are Divine" by Valerie Parente

“Dear child,” the being of light proclaimed, “For too long you have been wrapping your identity around victimhood. You are not a victim. You are Divine. You are strong. You are powerful. You are made of the most powerful forces in the universe and that is why you are conscious. Remember your roots. Remember your power. And you will do this through knowledge. Educate yourself. Enrich your life with experience. And depend on no one to save you. Lonely? Teach yourself. When it hurts, listen to the lessons. When it feels good, bask in your essence. When your ego deeply yearns for something please remember that you are not your ego and the things that matter in the grand scheme of life transcend your ego’s instincts and one day in a timeless realm you will feel this deeper than you ever imagined possible. You have learned all of this before you were born, your flesh suit has simply forgotten. All the answers are prevalent to your Divine essence. Activate the soul inside. The answers glow inside your self. Look to yourself, and nobody else. You are Divine.”

– Valerie Parente (7-18-2019)

Games

July 10, 2019July 11, 2019Leave a comment

"Roll the Dice" by Valerie Parente

Games by Valerie Parente

I’m not over you,
I’m over the games.

I’m over rolling the dice to see if today you’ll be nice, wondering if I’ll have to fight to bring out your good side.
I’m over the way you play me for a fool while I just play aloof, pretending I don’t see the truth but I know your every move.
I’m over showing all my cards like I’ve got the king of hearts but then you try to be smart and leave me at a loss.
I’m over not knowing what comes next because you’re shuffling the deck trying to create randomness before it’s my turn to guess.
I’m over calling all your bluffs and trying to earn your trust because you’re too scared to grow up and admit there could be an “us”.

Then you yell and you scream because you want to beat me but what you failed to see is we’ve been on the same team.

– Valerie Parente (7-10-2019)

Humanity

July 6, 2019July 6, 2019Leave a comment

Humanity by Valerie Parente

To live is to feel
To feel is to emote
To emote is to communicate
To communicate is to connect
To connect is to love
And to love is to live.
Don’t waste your life
fighting your feelings.

– Valerie Parente (7-6-2019)

Rollercoaster

June 29, 2019June 29, 2019

Rollercoaster by Valerie Parente

I’m starting to hope that this ride ends soon
because I’m so sick of trying to make sense of you

I’ll admit I liked the high, but I sure do miss the ground
at first it was a thrill, but I think I might throw up now

Yes you showed me a good time but I want so many more
I think that’s why I held on so tight to this rollercoaster

It’s getting pretty late and we probably should go home
I wish you’d come along but I won’t be surprised if you don’t.

Tycoon

– Valerie Parente (6-29-2019)

Lexi

June 27, 2019Leave a comment

Lexi by Valerie Parente

I was not heart broken when she died
I was heart broken when she was dying
Once she died I felt a feeling of relief
and I think that’s God’s way of telling me
she’s where she’s meant to be.

Lexi

– Valerie Parente (6-27-2019)

A Writer’s Threat

June 4, 2019June 4, 20191 Comment

A Writer’s Threat by Valerie Parente

For years I have been my own muse.

If I make you my muse then you have done the near-impossible… you have overthrown my ego. Congratulations, you are divine in my eyes.

Just hope to God that you’ve become my muse for enchanting my life, not for inflicting senseless pain. Because if you try to write me off then I’m going to turn the writer on. If you ask me to stop then guess what? You just gave me a new prompt. I can orchestrate a symphony of sentences that will touch you to tears or I can arrange a thousand words into your personal hell. Both will pierce your heart ten times stronger than you pierced mine. And when you read what’s on my mind you better actually listen to the message and cherish the emotional chords it strikes, good or bad, because a storm of more rhymes and literary devices are about to head your way and tear apart every piece and particle that once constructed your comfort zone… and that’s going to continue happening with more and more force until I become your muse.

felt cute, might stab someone with my words later

– Valerie Parente (6-4-2019)

A Poetic Manifesto

May 30, 2019May 30, 2019Leave a comment

A Poetic Manifesto by Valerie Parente

What it means to be an artist is that I take my life experiences and process them through a creative filter. My internal world manifests best through the art of written word. As a result, when I’m in pain I might write a “dark” piece. To those who find this work disturbing, this is my rebuttal.

"Scar Tissue"

I have every right to say anything I want to say
because this page is my stage and this is my brain
and the reason you felt uncomfortable when you read it
was because you have resonated with it.
If you become upset knowing that I am broken
then please understand that writing about my mental health
is how I begin to heal myself.

I will never stop emoting and hurting and healing and if any of this is problematic for someone then I pray you find the strength to learn how to be human one day.

– Valerie Parente (5-30-2019)

the truth is, I’m frustrated

May 28, 2019May 28, 2019Leave a comment

the truth is, I’m frustrated by Valerie Parente

"the truth is, I'm frustrated" by Valerie Parente

I’ve been the strong one. I’ve proved I’m smart, have a heart, and can read the mind of the most troubled. I’ve traveled, I’ve stayed, I’ve gone out of my way, I’ve done everything under the sun to prove that I am good enough. I’ve felt high, I’ve felt brave, I’ve felt the electricity every cliché claims. I’ve given time, I’ve given space, and left you so amazed. I’ve been brutally honest, I’ve been reassuring, even when my mind was hurting. I’ve been a friend, I’ve been family, I’ve been a team-player even when you played me. I’ve been wise, I’ve been right, and I understand your mind when I write my lines. I’ve been forgiving, I’ve maintained a good mood even when I should have been rude. I’ve been sweet, I’ve been grateful, even when I should have hated you. I’ve been impressive, I’ve been respectful, I’ve shielded you from my pain even when it drove me mental. I’ve gone above and beyond and I did it for what?

At what point did I go wrong?
I see a boy care about me then I watch it dissolve.

What is it about me that nobody wants?
Because every time I care I become the saddest person of all.

The truth is, I’m frustrated, and I think I have every right to be. Because I’ve been the kindest person of all and the girl God needed from me. So why the hell am I alone? Why the hell am I unseen? I’m right in front of your faces being the best damn version of me.
Call me crazy, why not?
But I think it’s a damn shame
when you’re there for someone’s darkest hour but they won’t give you the time of day.

All I want is to be loved.
And I think I’m fairly done.
Because I don’t know how much longer I can be the strong one.

– Valerie Parente (5-28-2019)

Paradox Lock

May 22, 2019May 22, 2019Leave a comment

Paradox Lock by Valerie Parente

I am tense where I am supposed to be open
So I pretend that this is a voluntary means of coping
Just a treasure I’ve been withholding.
But the truth is I have no control
of the impossible pain that takes its toll.

I am a lock who is supposed to love a key.
The very thing meant to set me free
is the same cause for my strong agony.
What they call the highest of highs
comes through me as the loneliest night.

I am exhausted when I am supposed to be energized.
They say this problem has psychological ties
manifesting as fear deep inside.
But if this is true then why can’t I recall
the very trauma that started this all?

For so long I was stuck with this mystery.
Where could I find this abnormality?
After they pointed out reality
I read into how this condition thrives
but I am still left wondering why.

Lock