Cry Wolf by Valerie Parente
I’ve said it once
and I’ll say it again:
People want to be a hero so badly,
they’ll create a villain.
Because when you cry wolf
in a self-righteous hoax
you don’t really undermine
the real bad guys.
– Valerie Parente (7-1-2020)
Reflecting by Valerie Parente
When she reflects on her behavior
she sees her full figure
a girl who longed to be the healer
of someone as dear as a stranger
a person who liked to treat her
like she was just a feature
of what he saw in the mirror
until he found someone weaker
whose insecurity stroked his ego deeper
and now she couldn’t see it any clearer
that this hellish pain is what freed her.
– Valerie Parente (6-30-2020)
For anyone interested in supporting my mission to find beauty in darknes, I just made a Patreon account. No pressure to join, I just figured I should make the option available as an artist in this day and age. http://www.patreon.com/valerieparente
The overarching theme to all my artwork- whether it is poetry, prose, stories, drawings, paintings, or photography- is finding beautiful darkness. I love finding the positive in dark moods, situations, and imagery. This is evident in my written work on my website, valerieparente.wordpress.com, and in my novels available on Amazon (“The Artist, The Muse”, “In Touch”, and “Rather Be Haunted”. I draw inspiration from a lifelong and personal struggle with very severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and anorexia. Each body of work I create centers around mental illness.
The Artist, The Muse : a poetry and prose collection about what it is like to have a mental disorder that influences your art.
In Touch : a fiction novel about a female with OCD, based on my real-life struggle with OCD, through the eyes of a male without the disorder.
Rather Be Haunted : a poetry and prose collection that explores love, heartache, and death from the perspective of a girl with OCD that feels “haunted” by the motifs in life that define her humanity, including my signature Mannequin Art (used as a commentary on what it means to learn how to be a “normal” human).
Thank you from the bottom of my heart if you are interested in my journey to discover beauty in darkness.
Red Flags by Valerie Parente
Next time I see warning signs I need to realize
that this frustration makes me see red;
that’s why the red flags were easier to protect
because the color wasn’t something I noticed.
– Valerie Parente (6-22-2020)
I Said What I Needed to Say by Valerie Parente
I think a lot of people have a hard time walking away
because they could never said what they wanted to say…
but I found my words
I’m only upset because I don’t think they were heard.
– Valerie Parente (6-19-2020)
Forward by Valerie Parente
You don’t have to explain yourself,
the past is in the past,
it’s time to enjoy life again,
so don’t you dare look back.
When you want to regress,
just remember the fact,
that love is supposed to feel good,
it’s not a battle to be had.
You romanticized the struggle,
you let the feelings drag,
because it felt safer in this circle,
when you ran another lap.
There will be moments of doubt,
you’ll be tempted to go off-track,
but if you keep moving foward,
then you’re on the right path.
You’re not running away from problems,
you’re making a future that will last,
those old feelings were addicting,
and there’s no time to relapse.
– Valerie Parente (6-17-2020)
Typical Feeling by Valerie Parente
It’s not fair for me to attach myself to memories
because the things that are important to me
aren’t necessarily admired equally
it doesn’t matter how strongly I believe
feelings are not facts, they’re just brain chemistry
and maybe if I accept that as my reality
then I wouldn’t seem like this OCD creep
memorizing feelings that nobody else reads
it’s a habit that’s no longer helping me breathe
because appreciating details gets pretty lonely
and reading your energy exerts my energy.
I guess it was just a typical feeling
that I glorified beyond its meaning
then modified my priorities like a chameleon
and fell for traits that promote teasing
a mistake I’ve made before, despite reason
but this time I finally stopped believing
and I’ll never go back to daydreaming
because this match was never even
just a rigged game I used for healing
and in that way I was also scheming.
I guess there’s nothing special about my demons.
– Valerie Parente (6-16-2020)
I Wouldn’t Change A Thing by Valerie Parente
I’m still trying to untangle the web of associations I made with you
because you were present during some of my greatest moods.
I tried so many new things with you alongside me
I became an adult and I filled a hole that was deep.
Part of me thinks I never should have let that joy inside
but what kind of world would it have been without all the good times?
The conclusion to this relationship will always be a shame
but someday I know I’ll be able to remember without the pain.
If I could choose between what I wanted and what’s currently happening
then I can assure you beyond a doubt that I wouldn’t change a thing.
– Valerie Parente (6-11-2020)
My Mantra by Valerie Parente
You can go to bed a mess
as long as you wake up feeling blessed.
– Valerie Parente (6-10-2020)
Why? by Valerie Parente
I’m really not trying to live in the past tense
but why after all the ways you made my mind bend
do I still want to protect you from the consequence
of how you destroyed me with your actions?
I’m really not trying to cause any hurt
you might even ask “why would she print these words?”
and it’s because I’ll never be able to move forward
until I put these feelings on the record.
– Valerie Parente (6-9-2020)
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